Most of us struggle with balancing the demands of modern life. And get trapped reacting to external pressures rather than intentionally shaping each moment. You’re a peacekeeper, an empath, a listener, and so much more. But confrontation-avoidant individuals often have the patience to let things unfold naturally, even if it means living with some degree of uncertainty.
- Resolving conflict is impossible if you’re unwilling or unable to forgive others.
- If you disagree with or dislike what’s being said, you might use negative body language to rebuff the other person’s message, such as crossing your arms, avoiding eye contact, or tapping your feet.
- Having the skills and support of a trusted therapist can make an immeasurable difference as you learn to replace your old ways of thinking about and responding to stress with more effective ones.
- It’s possible—but you likely will have to accept the relationship for what it is and learn to approach it differently from your other relationships.
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Not everyone is comfortable with conflict, and I can certainly relate to that. And if you can switch those questions, and ask yourself, how is that person right? You’re going to get some really valuable information. But regardless of who’s expressing it, you want to deal with it in the same way, which is to focus on the content of what they’re saying, and not the tone or approach that they’re using. So really validate what they value so that they feel understood and they feel like that you’re on the same page, that you’re in this together.
Find New Ways to Relieve Stress
In turn, this can lead to more compassionate and effective resolutions. Demonstrating empathy can also de-escalate tension, making people feel heard and respected — an essential element for resolving conflicts amicably. Enter active listening, the cornerstone of effective conflict resolution. Deeper than simply hearing the details of a problem, active listening involves paying full attention to the issue — concentrating, responding, and remembering what your team members are saying.
Toward Interpersonal Conflict Resolution
Learning how to confront someone assertively won’t happen overnight. But you can still take small steps each day toward feeling more comfortable facing your fears and speaking up for yourself. Leaving conflicts unresolved leads to pent-up frustration and a greater sense of loneliness that can build up over time.
For instance, starting a sentence off by saying “I feel that…” or “I think that…” emphasizes the fact that you’re speaking about your own experiences and not assuming you know what’s best for others. If you are in a toxic work situation that is causing job stress, and it isn’t getting better, start to consider your options. While you shouldn’t have to get another job simply because your current one isn’t handling a situation very well, it may be your best option. Human resources can let you know about your organization’s policies against bullying as well. In many cases, there are specific actions that a person committing harassment in the workplace is subject to, such as warnings or termination, depending on the severity of their offenses. The important thing is to come to a place of understanding and try to work things out in a way that’s respectful to all involved.
Make a resolution plan.
In relationships that are unsupportive or characterized by ongoing conflict, letting go may be a great source of stress relief. Only you can decide if a relationship can be improved, or should be let go. Unfortunately, active listening is a skill that not everybody knows. It’s common for people to think they’re listening, while in their heads, they’re actually formulating their next response. Journaling can be an effective way to get in touch with your own feelings, thoughts, and expectations so you are better able to communicate them to the other person. An important component of conflict resolution involves only you—knowing how you feel and why you feel that way.
Ways to Deal With High-Conflict People
You shut down, space out, and show very little energy or emotion. Mental health and wellness tips, our latest guides, resources, and more. Learn to say “no.” Know your limits and don’t let others take advantage of you. how to deal with someone who avoids conflict Look for alternatives so everyone feels good about the outcome. It’s okay to be angry, but you must remain respectful as well. Take a moment to calm down before deciding to continue a conversation or postpone it.
Other Types of Coping
So as a seeker, I might be causing passive-aggressive behavior in someone who is afraid to express their desires and their wants, because they think they’re not going to be met. So they think the only way to get them met is by sort of leaking them out. Even if you can admit a tiny bit that you’re wrong in a situation, it can open up a conversation tremendously to the other person, saying, well, actually I was behaving passive-aggressively. Any vulnerability you can show is really going to encourage the other person to do the same.
